Firstly, use your arm to stop nearest rival from over-taking. It's nasty, but sometimes necessary. Even if said rival is equipped for the conditions and finished in first position. Take car key fob out of pocket and prevent from getting wet, by holding you hand in the air. Once you hit the water, resume to belly-flop position and accept that you're going to get wet. Get up as quickly as possible and pretend it didn't happen. Repeat process at every river.
Deerstalkers 2008. Photos stolen from Sleepmonsters.com
What you failed to mention is that after swallowing half of the pond allow your nearest rival to overtake you never to be seen again!!!
Didn't want to kick you when you were down...ha ha ;-)
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